Have you got your pants in a bunch?
Jan 23
While getting Hanna ready for a bath she often times will pull her pants down and then push them farther down with her feet. Her pants and underwear and socks get in a big old bunch down at her ankles.
She just keeps pushing and pushing and pushing from the top thinking if she just pushes the bunch harder it will finally go over her feet.
Well… that doesn’t happen, it just gets more stuck. She gets really frustrated and ends up screaming and throwing herself on the floor.
At this point I tell her to take a deep breath and we talk about how else she might be able to get her pants off. She then pulls them from the bottom and sure enough they slide right off no problem.
So… are your pants in a bunch?
I see it (and can FEEL it) a lot in the comments on this site. You’re trying to get something done. You have limited time to do it in. It’s not going the way you think it should. You don’t even really know what the heck you’re doing or why you’re doing it. But it AIN’T working!!
So you just keep pushing and pushing at the bunch. Coming back to me, asking me more questions and going back to push at your bunch a little more.
Here’s the problem with this plan.
Just like I have to get Hanna to take some deep breaths and calm down before she can get her pants over her feet YOU need to calm down and take a deep breath.
As much as I love to help you all, and as many questions as I CAN answer in the comments section there are some things I just can’t help you fix without being able to see what the heck you’re doing over there. 
When I see comments coming through with lots of ALL CAPS and exclamation marks (unless you’re asking me to celebrate with you) my response will probably be to tell you to take a deep breath and take a walk. I’m not being facetious, I’m being quite serious. Just like Hanna will never push those pants off her feet just jamming them from the top neither will you manage to get done what you’re trying to do by jamming it through.
I have to say some of my most productive days have been days when I was so frustrated I was ready to pull my hair out (can anyone say internet connection intermittently going out and repeatedly losing half a lens I’m making for a client?). Anyway… those days I just pick up and we go to the park, or the zoo, or out for a walk or a stomp in a puddle. Almost ALWAYS when I come back to the task at hand it goes much smoother and I find it takes me half the time it would have if I had just kept jamming away at it.
Here are some of my very favorite ways to take a deep breath:
Listen to some of my favorite music that I can’t help but dance to
Go for a walk
Go to the Zoo
Take a bath
Go play at twitter or facebook for a while
Go push Hanna on the swings
Go for a bike ride (this one ROCKS if I can find a sitter)
Read a book
Watch Ellen or Oprah
So tell me… what are you getting scrunched up about and how do you get your pants out of a wad?
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That was cute–I used to be like that too when I was younger. My mom thought it was really stupid lol.
When this happens to me (in the metaphorical sense) I usually go to the arcade and play some games. Although if it’s a competitive game I’m playing I get even more stressed haha. Or I would sit down and read a book–I try to find a somewhat stupid book though so it’s lighter on the brain.
Jackie,
Thanks so much for the post. I have had many days like that. There are days that my stubborn drive to figure this (whatever it is) out right now and conquer it no matter what takes over. It does not serve me well, and I usually just end up frustrated. I need the reminder to pause and let it work out in a more effective, and less stressful way.
Lift one leg, push with the other and it slips right off.
I too take breaks, 10 minutes to a couple hours depending on the frustration level; watch TV, make a phone call or two, things like that.
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I have general rules ~ after 7pm (but I usually check for comments before I go to bed) Sunday mornings I don’t get on until after “This Week”. But really doing this part of it is what I love so the rules never really stick.
What I have had to make myself do is get up and do something else when I’m pushing the rock up the hill. There’s no sense fighting something that isn’t working and just getting frustrated. I’ll get more done if I DO walk away and come back with a better attitude.
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Oh yes! We have all been there (or stay there?) I think sometimes we just need a day or two without the computer.
Do you have a specified time when you turn it off for a few hours? I think that is my next trial technique. Turn it off all Saturday morning. Wonder if that will help?
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I think for me time is the biggest frustration. It’s better and worse right now as my youngest is about to turn a year old. She’s getting more independent at times but ooooh does she need me to pay attention to what she’s up to.
But that’s why naptime was invented, right? That and something about really cranky babies.
Then again I’ve often found my busiest days are my most productive. Knowing that I have a ton to accomplish really cuts back on the goofing off.
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